Kate Middleton Nude Photos – See Them Here!

Posted: September 17, 2012 in Uncategorized
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Ok, not.

But I guarantee you that this title will increase traffic to my blog fourfold. Nothing sells like sex except sex and the celebs of the moment. Ever wonder why?

Well, we already know why sex sells; it’s a primary instinct and drive within us. So that’s no mystery.

But what about the celeb part? Or royals? Why would we care that Kate slipped it off in a private place, so she thought? Who cares if folks want to trot around in the nude? As it seems, lots do.

Stroll down a European beach and you find it quite natural to discover nude sunbathing – by all ages, including families. They must find the British preoccupation amusing.

So here is my apology to the Prince and Princess from all of humanity. Please don’t think it presumptive of me to self-select as the representative spokesperson.

Dear Kate and William:

As the representative for all humanity I want to extend our sincere apologies for our unseemly intrusion into what should be your own business. Some people want to capitalize on the fact that you are young, attractive and human. They have been very, very bad and in so doing have smeared the rest of us humans. We are embarrassed and ashamed.

Though there is no excuse for such behavior, I want to extend, as the universal representative of all humanity, a modest explanation for this strange behavior that must be baffling to you.

Some people just live vicariously through your fairy tale lives. Don’t worry, it’s not personal. There have been others who have caught their fancy, too. The tabloids are like journals of your fantasy peers. You see, many people lead very boring lives. And they cannot escape the drudgery of it all. You, as it seems, are their only release of the moment. Again, it’s nothing personal because it will be someone else tomorrow. But you are the focus today.

Now I know you are wondering why they would be so fixated on the nudity itself. It’s because they don’t have your bodies nor the interesting sex life you do. Again, they are living through you as a kind of fantasy. They would like a charmed life, too. Or bodies someone might bother to photograph rather than avoid.

So you see how very pathetic this whole episode is – not for you, but for those who are obsessed. Just chalk it off to desperate people in search of a thrill. I know, you’re the target du jour. But the only thing to do is to accept that is the way it is. It’s great to be prince and princess, most of the time. And next time you want to take it off, well, just pull the blinds.

Most sincerely, on behalf of the all of humanity in the whole universe
Your Most Humble Subject

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Comments
  1. Jane says:

    Too stinkin’ funny!!!

  2. vmrtx says:

    Such beautifully crafted words! I love it!

  3. Well, we already know why sex sells; it’s a primary instinct and drive within us. So that’s no mystery.

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